OVERLAND: CARO'S UNUSUAL UNBOUND
OVERLAND: CARO'S UNUSUAL UNBOUND
Words: Caroline Dezendorf | Photos: Wil Matthews, Evan Kay, & Adam Kachman
Here’s the thing about life - it’s unpredictable.
One day you’re riding high, feeling like you’re at the top of your game. And then the next -- you’re lying flat on the tarmac after being struck by a car.
Everything stops. Life changes. No longer could I think about my plans and my goals leading into Unbound Gravel. No longer could I think about training. Everything became focused on rest and recovery.
And I struggled.
Being hit by a car has always been my worst nightmare when I get on my bike. And I struggled with the reality that it had finally happened; and there was nothing I could have done differently to prevent it. I’m thankful to be alive. Thankful it was not worse. But I have to admit, I was not prepared for the emotional rollercoaster that came with the injuries.
I felt defeated, frustrated, and sad.
Unbound Gravel 200 no longer seemed possible. With a concussion, broken radius, sprained neck, sprained shoulder, and sprained ankle, training was put on hold. With less than 4 weeks to the event, I thought my race was over before it even started.
Writing this may sound dramatic, but the truth is the last four weeks were anything but normal. I cried a lot. Slept a lot. And questioned how long it would take for me to feel normal. My body felt like all energy had been drained from it and most nights, I was in bed by 6pm. All I could do was rest and hope taking it easy - something I’ve never been good at doing - would allow me to feel healthy again.
The week leading up to Unbound, I started to feel the fatigue dissipate from my body and my head started to become less foggy. I was told 3 full days without concussion symptoms was what I needed to ride my bike. Tuesday came and went without symptoms, followed by Wednesday, and Thursday.
3 days.
Unbound was a go!
Caroline's Unbound steed - her trusty Cervelo Aspero
With my wrist in a brace and the greenlight from the Hand Surgeon, I packed my bags for Unbound. I was excited but terrified. Knowing about how brutal the Unbound 200 course is, I knew the chances of crashing were high and that I could not risk a second impact to my head.
I could not race Unbound.
That dream was gone. But I could ride. And so I set a new goal of just finishing the event.
Saturday morning, I lined up well behind all the other elite women. It’s so mentally difficult to accept that racing was not an option when I had been focusing on it for a year. But I was grateful to feel well enough to participate and decided that was a win in my book.
As we began to ride, I became emotional. There is something so powerful about being surrounded by a thousand other athletes from all walks of life, each with their own stories, trying to achieve the same goal: finish 206 miles and 11,000 ft of climbing in Kansas’ Flint Hills. As I rode with friends and strangers, working together to reach this goal, I knew quitting was not an option for me.
At one point, I met a man from Arizona who had already had 5 flats and we began to ride together. He looked over and said, “Well, my day is over so let’s get you to the finish.” It was amazing how these little acts of kindness from strangers motivated me to keep going forward. People, who as they passed, shared words of encouragement and Kansas locals, sitting in lawn chairs on the side of the course, handed out much needed water. This community reminded me why I so desperately wanted to be part of this event, even if I couldn’t race it.
Despite the pain in my wrist, the exhaustion, and the nausea, I pedaled on. I wasn’t going to let finishing this race be taken away from me. For the last month, it felt like everything else had gone wrong. Unbound is not an event you can complete easily. And luck needs to be on your side. For the last month, I had felt like I was not lucky -- that everything had gone wrong. But I think with Unbound, as soon as we started riding, my luck changed.
After 13 hours and 55 minutes, I crossed the finish line of Unbound Gravel 200. And I smiled. It wasn’t a race. I couldn’t race. But I finished and I finished as strong as I could have given the injuries. I am thankful to have been able to be part of the event. I’m grateful to my sponsors, friends, family, and doctors who helped me achieve this goal.
It wasn’t what I set out to achieve when I originally signed up for Unbound Gravel 200. But life happens. Things change. And we adapt.
Words: Caroline Dezendorf | Photos: Wil Matthews, Evan Kay, & Adam Kachman
Here’s the thing about life - it’s unpredictable.
One day you’re riding high, feeling like you’re at the top of your game. And then the next -- you’re lying flat on the tarmac after being struck by a car.
Everything stops. Life changes. No longer could I think about my plans and my goals leading into Unbound Gravel. No longer could I think about training. Everything became focused on rest and recovery.
And I struggled.
Being hit by a car has always been my worst nightmare when I get on my bike. And I struggled with the reality that it had finally happened; and there was nothing I could have done differently to prevent it. I’m thankful to be alive. Thankful it was not worse. But I have to admit, I was not prepared for the emotional rollercoaster that came with the injuries.
I felt defeated, frustrated, and sad.
Unbound Gravel 200 no longer seemed possible. With a concussion, broken radius, sprained neck, sprained shoulder, and sprained ankle, training was put on hold. With less than 4 weeks to the event, I thought my race was over before it even started.
Writing this may sound dramatic, but the truth is the last four weeks were anything but normal. I cried a lot. Slept a lot. And questioned how long it would take for me to feel normal. My body felt like all energy had been drained from it and most nights, I was in bed by 6pm. All I could do was rest and hope taking it easy - something I’ve never been good at doing - would allow me to feel healthy again.
The week leading up to Unbound, I started to feel the fatigue dissipate from my body and my head started to become less foggy. I was told 3 full days without concussion symptoms was what I needed to ride my bike. Tuesday came and went without symptoms, followed by Wednesday, and Thursday.
3 days.
Unbound was a go!
Caroline's Unbound steed - her trusty Cervelo Aspero
With my wrist in a brace and the greenlight from the Hand Surgeon, I packed my bags for Unbound. I was excited but terrified. Knowing about how brutal the Unbound 200 course is, I knew the chances of crashing were high and that I could not risk a second impact to my head.
I could not race Unbound.
That dream was gone. But I could ride. And so I set a new goal of just finishing the event.
Saturday morning, I lined up well behind all the other elite women. It’s so mentally difficult to accept that racing was not an option when I had been focusing on it for a year. But I was grateful to feel well enough to participate and decided that was a win in my book.
As we began to ride, I became emotional. There is something so powerful about being surrounded by a thousand other athletes from all walks of life, each with their own stories, trying to achieve the same goal: finish 206 miles and 11,000 ft of climbing in Kansas’ Flint Hills. As I rode with friends and strangers, working together to reach this goal, I knew quitting was not an option for me.
At one point, I met a man from Arizona who had already had 5 flats and we began to ride together. He looked over and said, “Well, my day is over so let’s get you to the finish.” It was amazing how these little acts of kindness from strangers motivated me to keep going forward. People, who as they passed, shared words of encouragement and Kansas locals, sitting in lawn chairs on the side of the course, handed out much needed water. This community reminded me why I so desperately wanted to be part of this event, even if I couldn’t race it.
Despite the pain in my wrist, the exhaustion, and the nausea, I pedaled on. I wasn’t going to let finishing this race be taken away from me. For the last month, it felt like everything else had gone wrong. Unbound is not an event you can complete easily. And luck needs to be on your side. For the last month, I had felt like I was not lucky -- that everything had gone wrong. But I think with Unbound, as soon as we started riding, my luck changed.
After 13 hours and 55 minutes, I crossed the finish line of Unbound Gravel 200. And I smiled. It wasn’t a race. I couldn’t race. But I finished and I finished as strong as I could have given the injuries. I am thankful to have been able to be part of the event. I’m grateful to my sponsors, friends, family, and doctors who helped me achieve this goal.
It wasn’t what I set out to achieve when I originally signed up for Unbound Gravel 200. But life happens. Things change. And we adapt.